Mothers Story Project: A Mothers Story

I got pregnant my senior year of high school. I guess I was in denial because I didn't tell a soul. My mom walked in to the bathroom as I was getting out of the tub and saw me at 7 months. It went pretty fast after that. The doctor I went to suggested adoption and that was that. I went to the lawyer he told me to and she told me she had families for me to chose from. I picked the first ones. No other options were given to me, no one explained to me that I should try to keep my child. Losing my son has had a lasting effect on me. I can't enjoy life. It seems like it is just out of reach. Something is missing. My son turned 17 in May, and I haven't tried a full-blown search as of yet, so we haven't met. I think there needs to be more talk about keeping families together. I wish someone, just one person, had told me I could do it. I know I wasn't a girl who went away, but my situation hurt all the same. I don't think of any of us as different, we are all one, with that one common denominator, we lost our child. I don't care if you are 93 or 23, the outcome was the same. I am just now coming to terms with what happened thanks to finding support online. I hope to find my son someday. We shouldn't have to go through this.